A matter of choices

Life is full of choices.  And they’re all choices we have to make, whether we like it or not.

Last week, I chose to apply for a job at Half-Price Books as Jenn.  Well, as much as I could.  The app still had all my maleness strewn across the pages with reference to history and such.  The answers to the questions were very much Jenn-isms….

When I got called in for an interview, I had another choice to make.  Male or female.  It was a tough decision to make, but I ended up going in as my male persona.  The interview went well enough.  As I interviewed, I kept thinking to myself that I should have gone as Jenn.  Jenn is who turned in the application and all three of the managers have waited on me as Jenn (though none of them looked like they knew that).  I was clearly not happy with the choice I had made.

Waiting to hear back has been excruciating, so I decided to head down today to speak with them.  I chose to go as Jenn.  I didn’t want to dress as nice as I did for the drop off, so I went with what I thought was a bit of a dressed up but dressed down look.  A rocker chick look.  Black jeggings, boots, shirt…..well, see below.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As I wandered through the store, to see if there happened to be anything I couldn’t possibly live without, I was approached by a gentleman so exclaimed, “Damn!  You look really good in those tights.  Seriously.  Too hot for words.  It’s a sin how great you look in those.”  I thanked him and he continued to exclaim as he headed for the door, after paying me a little more attention.  I have no idea if he knew I wasn’t a GG, but I don’t care.  It wasn’t abrasive and it made me  feel good.

I continued to look around and saw my friend who works there.  It took her a while to recognize me and she exclaimed, “You look AMAZING!”.  So maybe he didn’t know, after all…  Anyway, we talked about the job and how they haven’t said anything yet.  Unfortunately, none of the managers were working at the time.  😦  I really wanted to speak with them.  My friend said that they would have NO problem letting me work there as Jenn.  It’s how they are as a group.  As a store.  As a company.

I may try going down one more time as Jenn, to see if they’ve made a decision, or a choice, if you will.  🙂

 

 

I should add.  If I am able to work as Jenn, it will be my coming out to everyone, and the opening of the door for transition.  I have friends that frequent HPB and I will have to tell them prior to them popping in and seeing me.  My fingers, legs and eyes are crossed for something good….

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About Jennifer

She grew up in an Indiana town Had a good-lookin' mama who never was around But she grew up tall and she grew up right With them Indiana boys on them Indiana nights Well, there are partial truths above. Being from Indiana, I did grow up in an Indiana town. I did not have a good lookin mama, but she was always around.'I did not grow up tall, but I suppose I grew up right. I spent lots of time with Indiana boys on Indiana nights. It's because I was one. Still am in some ways. Certainly not in others. My transitional journey has begun. Goodbye to my male self and hello to this wonderfully feminine world in which I was meant to live. At the age of 45, I am beginning my true journey to self and home.
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5 Responses to A matter of choices

  1. Tracy says:

    That’s a great look for you, looks natural :-). I’m crossing my fingers for you!

  2. Teresa says:

    I too hope you get the job because not only is it work but it will start off your transition nicely. On the other hand I’m envious of those legs bitch. 🙂

    Teresa

    • Jennifer says:

      Thank you, Teresa. I have a follow up to this entry that I will post today or tomorrow!!!! I want to work there SO badly, it hurts. To work and to begin to fully be me.

      Don’t be envious of my legs, seriously, they are so bowed that a small family could live comfortably in that bowed section. 🙂

  3. Pingback: A Follow Up | deviant thoughts

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